The Benny

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Sunday 18th August 2019 1.10pm

The time is relevant to this story because my weekend is full and everything has to go right if I’m to get to the footy. On Friday night we go out as a family to see Shakespeare in Love at the Playhouse and, unless we are greatly mistaken, Geoffrey Rush, who was in the film 20 years ago, is sitting a few rows in front of us. It is a wet, cold night and the kids don’t really want to go out to see a play they’re sure they’ll hate. But they are converts well before the interval. It’s the bit with the dog that seals it.

We catch a late tram home and see on the phone that the Demons have lost to Sydney, at home, by 53 points. Sydney who had not won for two months, have flogged them. What on earth has happened to Melbourne? It’s one of life’s great mysteries.

I’m up before five and out the door a bit after six. I ride, in the early light, to Spencer Street and catch the 7.05 to Wodonga. On the train I eat toast from a paper bag, coffee from the thermos, do a bit of the crossword, have a good sleep, look out the window and all is right with the world.

From Wodonga Station I ride to Mum’s house and have a lovely day and night with her. I catch the 6.44 morning train back to Melbourne. More thermos coffee, more toast from the bag, a bit less sleep than I wanted. I make a bold decision to alight at Broadmeadows rather than stay on until the city. I am greatly vindicated by the howling northerly wind which pushes me home to Preston in good time. That train can really crawl from Broady into the City and then I would have had to ride uphill, and into the wind, to get home.

For the first time in a while I’ll have company at the footy. My daughter and I leave home half an hour after I arrive, catch the tram in good time and walk through the gardens to the ‘G. We’re in standing room in M9 with a good spot against the barrier, a good half hour before the first bounce. Time for some hot chips and a bit of the quiz before the fun starts.

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West Coast win the toss and kick to the City End, as teams do when they win the toss. Is that so Richmond won’t be kicking to the Punt Road End in the last? Whatever the reason, it pays off for them handsomely as they are out to a five-goal lead in no time. They don’t seem able to drop the ball or miss a shot at goal. Richmond seem to give them all the room and time that they want and they don’t want much. A second too long here, a yard or two there, and they have another goal.

They get the first two before Caddy marks a good kick from Bolton and pulls one back for us. Caddy, with that goal we really need, again. Presti gives a clever, underground kick to Houli who finds Lynch who marks and misses badly. Then West Coast kick the ball around their backline at their leisure before setting sail for the City End where Hickey marks easily and goals from 25 out.

Castagna gets one back for us, a very clever, bouncing grubber of a kick after a nice bit of ducking and weaving. But too soon after that the wrong Rioli gathers and steams into an open goal and it’s 2.1 to four straight and it’s galling how easily the Eagles can score. Our defence seems to be in tatters as Petruccelle gathers and goals and they have five. Another easy mark to Oscar Allen and we’re almost four goals down and the quarter isn’t half over.

Do the Eagles have the wind? Or are we just hopeless and flat-footed? Is this the first good team we’ve played in months? They pull us apart again and it’s seven straight to them and the lead is as good as five goals and despair is barely kept at bay in M9. Please let it rain! Let something stop this slick machine.

Then we get a bit of luck when Short kicks and goals from 45 out. West Coast attack again and Hurn lines up from the 50. But they are mere mortals after all and the Eagles have their first behind at last. Richmond attack but Lynch is out-marked very easily and I wonder if the kick to him had held up in the wind. We’re four goals down and West Coast are marking cleanly and kicking straight and our pressure game doesn’t seem to trouble them.
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Quarter-time score: Richmond 3.3.21 to West Coast 7.1.43

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At the break I think we’re only still in it if we win the second quarter. Well, that’s pretty obvious. And indeed, the game seems to have changed since Short got his late goal in the first. The sun has gone and rain might be coming, but we can’t see the sky from under the concrete at M9. It’s just us and the game.

The first West Coast attack at the Punt Road End is repelled but Richmond only kick a behind as they rebound. Then Riewoldt takes a great mark with is not paid because of the Toby Greene rule. Greene’s bad influence on the game is immeasurable. But then Rioli wins a free, kicks long to Bolton who gathers, weaves, makes space for himself and goals and a good chant of Richmond, clap, clap, clap, starts up. Maybe we can get back into this game?
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With about six minutes gone Lynch takes a huge pack mark, somehow plucking the ball from the air with arms all over the place, like a kelp forest. He kicks the goal from 20 out and we feel much better, it’s 5.2 to 7.1 and it hasn’t even started raining yet.

West Coast attack again, Kennedy marks in a pack but only kicks a behind. Then Flyin’ Ryan takes a pack mark which is paid, unlike Riewoldt’s and we are not surprised. And he goals and we’re three down again. Ryan’s mark followed Edwards losing the footy on the 50. Many of our players have made big mistakes, while the Eagles seem to do everything right. This is very hard to watch.
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Shedda makes amends with a good pass to Chol in the pocket, but Chol who is usually a good set shot, misses this one. Houli marks a clearing kick from West Coast and kicks it to Riewoldt who misses and we trail by 16. Graham snaps a point and we don’t seem able to find the big sticks. But then Riewoldt does, after marking on a tight angle 20 metres out and there’s only 10 points in it.

West Coast attack with their appalling grace and fluidity – and in their dreadful Marketing Department jumpers – but Kennedy is denied a free as he goes to ground in a tangle with Grimes. I’m amazed, players often get frees these days for falling over. But then Soldo is denied a mark right in front so it’s not going all our way. Castagna gets into the bad kicking habit by missing an easy set shot by doing that silly side-on thing that’s all the rage now.

This is much better though. But while there’s more fight for the footy we have only a few goals to show for a long period of dominance. West Coast’s ability to attack quickly and cleanly is really frightening. If they dominate for another half a quarter like they did at the start they could wrap this game up. On the other hand, if we can win this after giving them a five-goal start it will be one to remember.

Half-time score: Richmond 6.5.41 to West Coast 8.2.50

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By the time the Auskickers have left the field it has gotten much colder and my coat is zipped up and my scarf is wrapped tightly around my neck. The rain starts and supporters seek shelter from their expensive, but exposed seats. Some look quite unwell after braving the rain in those awful throw-away ponchos.

The match becomes a slog which might suit us, but almost ten minutes pass without any goals. Then Tom Barrass does an embarrassing thing and passes perfectly to Lambert who marks 25 out and goes back and kicks it. Lambert simply amazes me. I’ve watched his third-quarter goal in the GF – the one that put us 28 points up – about fifty times and I still can’t believe how far and how quickly he ran to be in the right spot for Grigg’s handpass. He just works and works and works and his skills are polished from long use. But most supporters of other clubs have never heard of him.
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The margin is down to four points and maybe we can do this. Ellis goes in very hard in the back pocket and forces a boundary throw-in. The ball comes up our end again, and Lambert snaps for the third time in a minute with no reward. We’ve completely – or almost completely – controlled the game for half a quarter and we’ve one goal and few points to show for it. West Coast attack, win a mysterious free and goal, of course. They can’t bloody miss anything and we’re two goals down again.

Ross wins a free for a high tackle but misses from 25 out. Richmond attack again, Bolton gets it to Prestia who gets it to Dusty who goals. This is the Richmond we like. It’s still raining and 26 minutes have passed and we’re one point down. West Coast attack and are repelled and in the misty rain someone is being helped off the ground by the trainers at the City End. There is concern in M9 and my daughter thinks it’s Grimes. I’m sure it’s a West Coast player because an injury to Grimes is unthinkable. The ball is on our forward pocket when the siren goes. This is a shame as I could have watched us slowly but surely grind the Eagles to defeat in the drizzling rain for the rest of my life.
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Three-quarter-time score: Richmond 8.8.56 to West Coast 9.3.57

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Grimes is back and Dusty opens the last quarter with a point and scores are level. Then Baker gets it to Castagna who gets it to Bolton who marks 25 out, but kicks badly and we’re a point up. Then Soldo wins a free for kicking in danger – the one that’s paid about once a year – and he goes back and kicks it from 25. I’ve really loved Soldo’s form in recent months, he seems to be getting better and better and he’s starting to kick Caddy-like goals, the ones we really need.

Riewoldt handpasses to Shedda who goals and we’re up by 13 points and we should bury these interstate interlopers with their awful song. But they won’t bloody lie down and Ryan wins a very doubtful free kick for high contact, goes back and kicks it and there’s only seven points in it.

Lynch wins a free for high contact after a Barrass, I think, hurdled into him. From a tight angle, 15 out, he kicks it and we’re 13 points up again and surely the burial of the Eagles has begun. West Coast have kicked only three goals since quarter time and we’ve kicked eight. From a boundary throw-in they score again and it’s only seven points. Why won’t they just lie down and die?

Ross makes a horrible mistake, giving the ball away on the back-line right in front of us and another bloody Eagle goal results. They’ve got their kicking boots on today, our defence seems to be in disarray and we’re only a point up. Lynch comes to the rescue once more, snaps and goals and 24 minutes have gone and it’s seven points. West Coast win a free against Baker for some reason but from 25 meters out they miss. At last! An easy miss! But it’s six points and far too tense to be any fun.

Kennedy marks right in front. From my completely objective standpoint he seems to be holding onto Astbury, my brother-in-law’s cousin’s daughter’s boyfriend, but the umpire doesn’t see it and Kennedy goals and the scores are level and why did we miss so many gettable shots and why do we have to go through this agony? And please let us score again, please.

It’s raining again and 27 have gone and Ellis who just keeps trying, week in and week out, gets it to Riewoldt who goals and we’re six points up. And at this point I have to put my notebook away because it’s too close and too tense and the quarter is endless. Minutes crawl by like years and it keeps raining and the Tigers keep fighting for the footy. With 34 minutes gone they win it again and Rioli has it and then Castagna has it and he bangs it towards the goal and all we want is a point, just one more beautiful point, but we don’t even need that because the siren has sounded and we jump up and down and scream and shout and burst into song. What a relief. What a great win after giving this very handy team, who just happened to be the reigning premiers, a five-goal start.
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Full-time score: Richmond 13.10.88 to West Coast 13.4.82

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Houli has been great, again. Dusty, very good, Vlaustin very good too. And I liked Soldo’s game a lot, he’ll be very unlucky if Toby pushes him out of the side. And, as usual, a huge list of players who did all they had to do. The ones who come to mind, Lambert, Graham, Ellis, Lynch, Riewoldt, Prestia. Face facts, we have a bloody good team and nearly everyone plays really well every week. It would be easier to pick out the ones who might have disappointed, but I would hate to do that.

This week, Brisbane, who are top of the ladder. And we thought we came from nowhere in 2017! It really is all on the line this Sunday.

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Benny Votes

Houli 5, Martin 4, Vlastuin 3, Soldo 2, Lambert 1

Leaderboard

Houli 45
Martin 42
Vlastuin 33
Lynch 28
Grimes 27
Edwards 23
Stack, Prestia  18
Lambert 17
Ellis 13
Cotchin, Bolton 7
Castagna 6
Nankervis, Graham 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Astbury, Ross, Naish, Soldo 2
Rioli, Balta 1

Sunday 11 August, 3.20pm, MCG
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I leave the house in a rush but go back for my gloves as it’s so cold. But I still manage to forget my scarf, of all things, and I don’t realise until I’m well up the road. I’m aiming for a train that I’ll have to run for and I don’t go back for the scarf. I hope this doesn’t bring us bad luck.

I have to give up on the train and I catch a timely tram instead. If you think we’re spoiled for choice with public transport in Preston you are right. I get into the ‘G a few minutes before the start. Tigerland is being played and sung by some as I make my way to M9. The players are warming up in the teeming rain and after the Friday night snow in Canberra I reflect on the sadness of Melbourne, that no matter how cold it gets, it’s never going to snow. And Rob Snarsky’s song comes into my head, “It starts with snow and it ends with rain…” which for this round of footy will be the case.

Riewoldt is Captain. Cotch is sitting this one out and Dusty’s out too, with “general soreness.” It’s Shedda’s 250th and he’s the 250th player to reach that milestone. Later I will see on the telly that fewer that 2% of AFL players get to that many games. So well done Shedda, we love you and we’re very proud.

Riewoldt wins the toss and chooses the City End so that we’ll kick to the Punt Road End in the last. At the huddle Lynch looks happy and relaxed. But I can only tell this by looking at the TV screen. In real life all the players with blond hair look the same and I struggle to pick Lynch, Riewoldt or Broad apart. Ellis is a bit easier as his shape is distinctive.

Richmond dominate early and after 13 minutes Riewoldt marks a perfect pass from Stack and goals from outside 50. A few minutes later Lynch marks close in, plays on and goals despite being tackled and falling over. Perfect passes from Houli to Caddy to Lynch follow but he misses from 30 meters. Carlton win a soft in-the-back free but miss from 25 out and maybe this will be our afternoon?

Bolton handpasses to Graham who kicks the wet ball from outside the 50 and goals. There is sunshine now and light rain and quarter ends and we’re three goals up and playing quite well. Edwards has had a heap of marks and has been very busy.

Quarter time score: Richmond 3.2 to Carlton 0.2

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It’s always good when Richmond are attacking the Punt Road End. When we’re winning that is. Graham makes a great smother to force a boundary throw-in on the forward flank. Light rain falls, Riewoldt gathers and snaps a behind. Carlton attack but a Vlaustin mark stops them in their tracks. Tigger is playing very well.

The ball is in the pocket in the teeming rain and we win a free for out-on-the-full. The ball lands on the deck, Graham gathers, kicks as he’s tackled and goals. He’s playing like he really wants to play finals again. Watching footy in the rain brings out a lot of nostalgia and clearly this is shared by the players too who organise a bit of a brawl after Graham’s goal, but I’m too busy scribbling to see how it started.

It does remind me of the best radio call of all time – the ’79 GF which we taped and played and replayed on a loop. And Smokey Dawson said to Doug Bigelow at one point, “You watch the fights Doug, I’ll watch the footy!”

Carlton are attacking more than I want them too but can kick only points, even when Richmond gift them a chance after going backwards like in the worst days of Wallace and Frawley. What could go wrong if we keep kicking backwards?

Richmond attack again and Bolton makes a very brave attempt to mark. He still manages to handpass to Graham who steadies and snaps his third. In the teeming rain he can do no wrong.

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Chol on the other hand can do little right and drops an easy mark. Well, it would have been easy on a dry day. But Chol does get a handball to Graham – why give it to anyone else? – who goals again and we’ve kicked six and Carlton have only four points. I love the idea of keeping Carlton goal-less for a whole game. Carlton attack twice for two more points. Then Tigger, who’s been having such a good game, stuffs up the kick-out and gifts the Blues a goal. I’m a bit gutted that they didn’t have a goal-less half of footy.

Half-time score Richmond 6.4.40 to Carlton 1.6.12

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At half-time I go to the loo and line up for a latte and miss out on the horror of “Are you paying attention?” I can still hear the theme music for it though. The coffee is very welcome.

At the start of the third term Lambert handpasses to Shedda who goals from 55 out. His mates gather around to celebrate. Lynch takes a great mark on the 50 and his kick is only a little short. Murphy for Carlton kicks a very clever banana kick in front of us which is pretty clearly a goal, but there’s never a good reason to spare us the spine-tingling tension and commercial opportunity of a score review, so there is one and it is a goal. Damn, the bastards have got two and we’re only 29 points up.

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Carlton are on top for the next ten or fifteen minutes and I don’t like it. Carlton attack again and get another goal and it’s 7.5 to 3.6 and the Tigers look a bit flat. After 24 minutes Lynch marks about 30 out, looks like he wants to give it away then goes back and kicks it. It’s been our first proper attack in a good while.

Casboult pulls one back for Carlton after a very good mark, right in front and it’s under four goals again. This is the sort of margin that could give a team hope and I wish we led by more. Richmond win a free 45 out and Lynch kicks a point. The free was for holding the ball, I think, and was a bit lucky as a Carlton player seemed to be chicken-winged. I think we’re a bit lucky to be four goals up as Carlton have had a very good quarter and our attacks were not convincing.

Just before the siren Ellis makes a huge attack on the footy on the half-back flank and a big tackle to follow up. He too is playing like someone who doesn’t want to miss a spot in the finals team.
While I write this the idiots are cheering for “Race the Jeep” at three quarter time. Honestly.

Three-quarter time score: Richmond 8.6 to Carlton 4.6

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We’re kicking to the Punt Road End in the last and I hope we bury the Blues. Kreuzer wins a free and then a 50 but misses his shot from 30. Richmond are under siege at the City End and Carlton really believe they can win this. Carlton win another free for out-on-the-full but the mug kicks out on the full himself. Maybe it won’t be Carlton’s afternoon.

Finally, six minutes into the quarter Richmond attack and Ross wins a free for deliberate out-of-bounds. Riewoldt takes a huge mark right in front and kicks a goal and I feel better.

Then Bolton, still not having a great game, gives away a soft free for high contact on the wing, then a fifty for a shove and then another fifty for holding his opponent up. Carlton kick the goal and it’s 9.7 to 5.8 and it’s raining again.

It’s heartening to see a big flock of seagulls in the corner of the centre square. The control freaks who run our game must be beside themselves. Those overhead wires worked for a while and now they don’t.

Carlton attack again and again and then Astbury marks in defence, only it’s not paid because Grimes touched it. But as Astbury is tackled as soon as he marks it – and has no prior opportunity that I can see – it should be a ball-up. No, Carlton free kick and now it’s 17 points and I really hate Carlton. Only 20 minutes have gone and there’s plenty of time for them to pull off an upset.

Vlaustin makes a massive spoil to put the ball out of bounds on the flank. He’s having a very good game and he ran a mile to get to this contest. Carlton attack again and a rushed behind results and they trail by 16. Richmond attack, Graham handpasses to Caddy who goals from a few feet out and Richmond are home. Then Rioli gathers, runs, bounces and kicks long to Castagna who marks in the square as the siren sounds. He goes back and kicks it and the song starts and we’ve won by 28 points.

Full time score: Richmond 11.7.73 to Carlton 6.9.45

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While it would have been great to wallop the Blues by 100 points and give our percentage a boost, that was probably never going to happen. They’re a handy team who’ve recently re-learned to believe in themselves and we ought to be happy with the four points. Without Martin and Cotchin too.

This week we play West Coast followed by Brisbane. If we beat both teams we can think ourselves good enough to win the flag. If we lose both we won’t be. Win one and lose won, who knows?

Best players for me were Vlaustin, Graham, Houli, Ellis, Lambert, Edwards and, bugger it, Astbury and Grimes. Those two are always good and, as I’ve pointed out before, it’s very easy to take them for granted.
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Benny Votes

Vlastuin 5, Graham 4, Houli 3, Ellis 2, Lambert 1

Leaderboard

Houli 40
Martin 38
Vlastuin 30
Lynch 28
Grimes 27
Edwards 23
Stack, Prestia  18
Lambert 16
Ellis 13
Cotchin, Bolton 7
Castagna 6
Nankervis, Graham 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Astbury, Ross, Naish 2
Rioli, Balta 1

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Saturday night 3rd August 2019
Saturday was my birthday but I was not at the ‘G but at the Recital Centre for a performance of Handel’s Music for the Royal Fireworks. This is a piece of music I cannot tire of and, it being my birthday, I had to go. So far as I can remember this was the second time I’d been to see a professional orchestra. You can see why tickets are expensive – the crowd is under a thousand and there’s fifty players on the stage. So many mouths to feed.

Anyway, the music moved me to tears and I had no regrets about missing this game of footy. When we got home, I settled on the couch and watched the second half on the tape. Days later I re-watched the whole game and now, having written about Handel and having tried, and failed, to link him to my beloved Tigers, I had better get down to business.

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This is Tom Lynch’s 150th game and it so happens that Richmond’s ladder position, games won, points for and against, are almost identical to how they were in round 20 in 2017. Melbourne have won only five games all year. What’s happened to our fellow prelim final losers?

A clue to the dysfunction of their club is the strange rock guitar which sounds out as their players gather before the banner and run through it. It’s not until the banner is in tatters and the players are warming up that “It’s a Grand Old Flag” is belted out over the PA. If you can’t get the song to play at the right time…

The first VFL game I ever went to was this fixture in May 1973 when my family came down from Canberra to buy a brand-new Falcon 500 station wagon with a dual action tailgate. It was the biggest and the brownest car ever made in Australia. We stayed one night on Lygon Street and the next night with some friends in Burwood or somewhere. They barracked for Melbourne so they took us to the ‘G to see their boys take on the likes of Hart, Bourke and Bartlett. I was fickle and barracked for whoever was winning. Richmond won and they became my team and won the flag that year the next and this was perfectly normal.

So, things could have turned out differently. I like Melbourne’s colours and I love their song and I’m so glad they lost that game 46 years ago and that I don’t barrack for them. I would take our years of pain over theirs any day.
Back to Tom Lynch. Does he have a good nick-name yet? For want of anything better I’m going to call him Bluey, for this reason – his initials are TL which sounds like “teal” which is a shade of blue, if I’m not mistaken.
Bluey has played every game this year after missing most of the pre-season and I’ve liked every game I’ve seen him in. He’s big and skilful, works hard, does what he has to do and does it bloody well. And for such a big player he’s incredible in the rain.

This is also the 500th game for the umpire Shane McInerny. He is 48 years old and is ageing well in a stressful job. So 500 games is quite an achievement and his family have made a banner for him – yes, a banner for an umpire. Now that’s going straight to the pool room.

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The Tigers score first when Houli passes well to Riewoldt who finds Bolton who hits the post from 30 metres out. Then Riewoldt marks on an angle and centres to George 25 metres out. He goes back and kicks it because his terrible set-shot days are a distant memory. Five minutes have gone and we lead 1.1 to nothing.

Grimes is playing on Lewis except that it’s the other way around. Lewis is playing on him, the commentators say, to keep him quiet. People are waking up to what a champ Grimesy is. Early in the quarter he gives away a free for a hold and Lewis kicks the goal. After the hold against Betts in the second quarter of the GF which he got away with – he practically had him in a half-Nelson for several seconds – Grimes can never complain about umpiring. And so far as I can see, he never does.

Then the Dees get another goal after a goal-mouth scramble and it’s 1.1 to 2.0 and Melbourne are having a good spell. Jones gets the ball to Bayley Fritsch who scores and it’s 1.1 to 3.0.

Bolton lays a great tackle on Jones to show he’s no show-pony but a real Richmond grafter. Castagna weaves through the defence and sets up Martin who misses. Then Lambert – I’m almost certain but the commentators don’t name him and multiple replays on the telly don’t reveal his number – finds a bit of space and passes perfectly to Chol on a strong lead. He goals from 30 out on a 45-degree angle. Chol’s set-shots are very good.

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The set-up was classic Lambert. My daughter says he is the most under-rated player in the AFL. He was picked up by the Tigers in his fifth draft, or something ridiculous. And he’s just worked and worked and worked and now he’s a bloody good player in a bloody good team.

The Dees get a point and Martin kicks a point after gathering well. Riewoldt is held but doesn’t get a free and doesn’t sook about it because he just doesn’t. That’s not the Richmond way. From a boundary throw-in Rioli smothers the footy, Graham gathers and goals and it’s 3.1 a piece with a couple of minutes left.

Richmond attack again but with too many handpasses and Bolton kicks another point and we’re a point up at the first break.

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At the start of the second Riewoldt wins a down-field free and misses the easy shot. Viney is very composed at the other end and passes to Kyle Dunkley who goals from 45 out. The Dees have so many very good players and their ladder position is a mystery.

Edwards is very composed as he clears the ball from defence. I get a lot of pleasure watching him play, he’s another of the great under-rateds. Bolton marks and kicks to Lynch who marks and goals from 51 meters out, almost on the boundary. He’s our Bluey all right.

Grimes takes a big mark on the wing and Baker takes a highly unlikely contested grab in a pack of players. He’s five-eight in the old money, one of the smallest players going around. Riewoldt spills what would have been a very good mark, Martin gathers and handpasses to Caddy who snaps from an angle and goals. Caddy’s happy knack of kicking goals when we need them – all right, when don’t we need them? – is returning.

Bluey gets another for us after a scramble in the forward line but Fritsch gets one back for the Dees from an out-on-the-full free. With five minutes left Angus Brayshaw takes a very brave mark and goals and we’re only two points up when we had seemed to be running away with it. Bolton marks from a Prestia kick but misses from 30 and he doesn’t have his goal-kicking boots on tonight.

At half-time it’s 6.5 to 6.2 and Gawn is very happy as well he might be. He’s playing a blinder and his team-mates are doing well and going in hard. Shedda says in a half-time interview that he thinks Richmond are being beaten.

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At half-time it starts to rain and as everyone learned last week from the Collingwood game, the Tigers love the wet. At the start of the third Houli passes to the beardless Lambert who marks and goals from the 50. He’s having another good game and another good season to go with many before. But Lewis pulls one back for the Dees with a Higgins-like bicycle kick in the goal-square and there’s only a half a goal in it.

Edwards glides past three defenders and kicks into the behind post, but not on the full. From the boundary throw-in Soldo sees the ball dropping short, steps forward and soccers it, on the full, through for a goal. Take that Dees! You thought Lewis was clever!

Another perfect pass from Dusty finds Riewoldt who kicks a point from the 50. Gawn takes yet another mark and is having a big game. Then Dusty gathers and kicks to Bolton who marks and kicks to Graham who marks in the pocket. The young feller – Graham that is – goes back and kicks from about 45 out on a tight angle. It’s almost, but not quite, as hard as Lynch’s earlier effort but Graham can do anything and he kicks it. He’s back to his late 2017 form which is a good thing for us.

Richmond lead 60 to 44 and the inside 50s for this quarter are nine to one. In the teeming rain Grimes soars for a great defensive mark on the wing. Presti sends the ball forward laces out to Lynch who marks. He kicks from 40 and the kick is high, straight and long and suddenly the Tigers are 29 in front with the third term nearly over.

Three-quarter time score: Richmond 11.9.75 to 7.4.46

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At the start of the last Fritsch is gifted a goal for an Astbury “strike” against a Melbourne player. I love Astbury and discovered the night we beat Collingwood that I’m related quite closely to him. He goes out with the daughter of my brother-in-law’s cousin. Yep, we’re family. So I’m glad that the ‘’strike” had, as they say, “not much in it” and he doesn’t get reported.
Halfway through the last quarter Richmond are 25 points up and inside 50s for the game are 60-30 our way. The game feels lifeless. The crowd is small at the ‘G on this wet night and the result seems to be foregone. Rioli wins a free 35 out for a good tackle, but misses. Dusty marks a long way out as the Dees clear from defence. He goals from 55 out. Our marking and kicking in the wet weather is simply amazing. It’s as if it has to rain for the players to show how truly skilled they are.

Dunkley wins a free for high contact against Grimes and kicks the goal. We’re 28 up and there’s seven minutes left. Houli passes to Butler who marks and passes to Bolton. Shai kicks from 25 and finally gets one and we’re five goals up again. We get a rushed point just before the end and win by 33.

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There’s a little ceremony at the end as the players form a guard of honour for McInerney the umpire. This is a nice touch and I love how much chit-chat – of the friendly kind – there is between players of different teams. It is just a game, after all. Interviewed by Richo, Houli agrees he’s playing the most consistent footy of his career, which is saying something, really. But what’s really heartening is to hear some booing as McInerney walks off between the lined-up players. I may be immature, but that strikes me as funny.

It’s been a solid win against the Dees. As everyone keeps saying, they’re a lot better than their ladder position and they beat us in the first half. Had it not rained, who knows what might have happened? It would have been good to have won by more and boosted the percentage but at the end of the day I’m proud of the boys, happy to get the four points and still taking it a week at a time.

Best players: Lynch, Houli, Lambert, Edwards, Grimes, Prestia, Vlaustin, Astbury. But as usual, very hard to pick them out.

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Benny Votes by Chris

Lynch 5, Houli 4, Lambert 3, Martin 2, Edwards 1

Leaderboard

Martin 38
Houli 37
Lynch 28
Grimes 27
Vlastuin 25
Edwards 23
Stack, Prestia  18
Lambert 15
Ellis 11
Cotchin, Bolton 7
Castagna 6
Nankervis 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Astbury, Ross, Naish 2
Graham, Rioli, Balta 1

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Clashing with this game, I was invited to go out to MONA and see Robert Forster. My gut reaction was noooo – its a huge game and I’ve got to watch it live. And Forster, aaaaah it’s great music but he’s such a knob. In the end, the gig won out. A night out with old friends can’t be recorded and experienced later like the footy. And Forster was actually great fun.

I maintained radio silence and came into the house with no knowledge of the score; although I did sing Tigerland in the car on the way home. Optimism has become the new default. Turns out there was five minutes left and we were gone out of sight, it was our night. I have watched the replay and these are the highlights, celebrations and frustrations.

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It’s very wet which suits us. It’s Bachar’s 200th, and I don’t remember a player held in such universal respect by Richmond people for what he has brought to our club and the footy community.

@masonsixtencox gets a charity free immediately and does the right thing, shanking a behind. A note for the rest of the game: umpires guess ruck frees and so do commentators, because there are NO RETIRED RUCKS COMMENTATING. Why is this? I think Grundy has done a little bit of special comments; but tonight he’s out there grappling with Ivan II.

The inaccurate ones, Bruce and BT are competing from the go for the worst howler. “Short, missed out on that grand final last year”. Then Treloar goals, he has great hands in the wet. Dusty handpasses to stationary Ivan II who is unfazed and flicks it on – everyone in this group trusts everyone else, it’s amazing. Houli and Vlastuin exchange handpasses while galloping the wrong way, brimming with confidence that openings will appear around them if they hold their nerve.
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Bolton gets it out wide and will always think of shooting first. In isolation this annoys me a little, when he has mates lining up in better positions; but in the big picture it’s good to have at least one goal guts. Vlastuin has started magnificently; his slalom run out of the back pocket another display of poise. A good sequence comes to Dusty who is a way out but the pure authority of his finish for our first goal lifts the team and the fans. Sidebottom has probably never had a worse quarter – his boots are on the wrong feet. Ellis hears his footsteps and Sidey takes possession but sprays his shot horribly. Bruce: “Crisp, strong in the hips” – I reckon he reads a lot of WH Auden.

Lord David Astbury absolutely nails Mihocek, everyone gets up with laughs all round. The wet footy is intense and even, the game hasn’t settled into any pattern yet. Then, Lynch is lucky twice. Goals from a cheap free, then is allowed to spin around and around in a tackle before dishing to Shai; goal. We’re off. “Graham, with his heavy hips” Bruce, I will pay you to stop talking about hips.

The soccer kick is the order of the day. Cotch and Dusty go to hoof the same ball off the deck – Cotch pulls out of it and I think that is when he gets a hammie twinge. He’s off for the day, but seems extraordinarily chirpy about it. He’s also waiting for news of his third baby being born.

Unusual to see two gun players on the bench with big grins all round, a minute before quarter time. Especially when one is already done for the day.

Lynch is pretty slow in a straight line, but that’s not surprising. I hadn’t realised he has played every game this season – that is admirable coming off his serious injury and no pre-season. Sidey and Pendles are not firing and De Goey invisible, Stephenson and Moore missing. We should be flogging these guys.

More ruck free kicks. Grundy gets one and while Ivan looks to the ump for the mark, behind him Grundy just gallops away and kicks a point. Up the other end Ivan wins the ruck lottery, and goals from his free kick.
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Broad kicks to Short, who kicks to Houli, who unloads with a huge woooof up the left wing to Riewoldt who outmarks Howe, spins and kicks it out in front of Lynch. Tom gallops onto it and goals, sensational team footy. 5.4 to 1.2 and quarter time.

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In the 2nd Q we dominated every moment until one minute to half time, when we spoiled it by coughing up two quick ones.

Tiges win every one-on-one in the first 90 secs. De Goey misses and it goes down the other end for a stunning goal. Lambert kicked from the centre to Lynch on 50. Lynch turned and launched a kick to the vacant goals, but by the time the ball landed Lambert was there to toe it through. Insane running. Marbs sells a dummy, nonchalant. We are playing off Dimma’s short pitch, as Astbury is taking intercepting marks at the front of the square. George seems to be drifting into defence more, he’s everywhere applying pressure and linking up.

In defence a Pie marks, plays on but has no idea what to do, and drops it at Dusty’s feet. He holds the hapless Pie at bay while he side-foots the sherrin to Stack who goals, its 46 to 9. Collingwood are a rabble. Marbs executes an off-balance drop-kick. Lynch goals again after the ball goes straight through Crocker’s marking attempt. Soldo is matching Grundy.

Jack and Tom team up for Tom’s 4th. Lynch hacked it in Riewoldt’s direction, leaving him a lot to do. But Jack is up to it, and in return lays it on a platter for Tom who nails the shot on the run, 61 – 11. Then we take the foot off the throat and allow a couple of Pies goals for a half time score 61-24. I think Collingwood may have run up the white flag at half time otherwise, it’s been that one-sided.

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I’ll be brief with the 2nd half, which was a little disappointing really. We don’t goal for most of the 3rd Q, then Martin marks and kicks it round the corner. He has been BOG. Grimes hasn’t had a mention yet but he has been just flawless in his timing, decision-making and leadership. Bruce compares him to Ben Hart, then Sydney Stack to Andrew McLeod. “If Grimes and Stack end up as good as Hart and McLeod they’ll be happy with their careers…” uhh respect to Hart but Grimes is a better player already, thanks.

De Goey goals, then Jack Riewoldt thumps a big goal from 55 after a delicate pass from Jack Graham who has hit his namesake on the chest twice this quarter. At 3QT it’s 78-40.
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In the last quarter we are finessin’ in forward 50. We’ve got three tall targets, and Dan Rioli pinpoints Marbs who is a lovely set shot. The Collingwood president leaves as Crocker hits the post. It was a lovely touch from his Channel 7 rivals to linger on his furious red-faced antics. Final score 98 – 66.

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Benny Votes

Martin 5, Vlastuin 4, Grimes 3, Lynch 2, Graham 1

Leaderboard

Martin 36
Houli 33
Grimes 27
Vlastuin 25
Lynch 23
Edwards 22
Stack, Prestia  18
Lambert 12
Ellis 11
Cotchin, Bolton 7
Castagna 6
Nankervis 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Astbury, Ross, Naish 2
Graham, Rioli, Balta 1

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Heading into the Port Adelaide game the thoughts through this writers head was about banking the win. On a day like it was, with the glorious sunshine, it was important to put this game in the back pocket.

The week before was different. That GWS game had significance for the club and fans, given that during the week we were pronounced as ‘flag favourites’ by the football media. Richmond as flag favourites… three weeks after three straight losses to middle of the road Adelaide and North, plus actual contenders Geelong. In the intermediate three weeks, a bye and the opportunity to beat-up on the Gold Coast and St Kilda.

Flag. Favourites. Sheesh.

After proving ourselves last week, the most important thing against Port, was to back that up with not just a win, but a solid win. A win where we displayed the Richmond way of footy that reinforces our chances for 2019. System, structure, style.

So we come to a very bright sunny and warm Saturday afternoon in July. “Big boy month”. The month that usually catches the Pies out, as they end to tumble down in July. Possibly the most significant month of the year, outside of September.

And on that bright sunny day, the old cliché “if you can’t play on a day like this”, etc was wheeled out. I was lucky enough to be invited to the game by Ryan, the Exiled Victorian, and joined him in the rather salubrious level two of the southern stand. All padded seats covered in jackets and scarves as far as the eye could see. Cup-holders! Attendants directing you to the bars ‘behind the glass’. Rare air for this M55 regular. Footy in the sunshine with bright and friendly company… a great day in store.

And entertaining footy by the Tiges to match the weather was the order of the day. A three goal to nil first 10 minutes saw to Port. Well, it didn’t completely finish them off as there was still 100+ minutes left, but you just felt that they were already done.

Prestia was good early, as too Bolton who had runs in the centre setup. And Lynch was out of the blocks early. Delightful footy.

And so it went for the day. Richmond holding off the Power after each thrust by them, and also working hard enough to increase the lead at each change. Winning every quarter. Dustin Martin was back to his best. Brandon Ellis copped a lot of rubbish from our section of the stands but pretty much proved the mockers wrong, bringing lots of drive from the back. He’s had a great year given his 2018, and I hope he stays. He’s almost a ‘best 22’ for the pointy end of the year.

At 3/4 time I said to Ryan with some shock and alacrity “Hey wait what? Is it three-quarter time? It can’t be!”. The game was just so fun that it didn’t seem like we were at that point of the game.

What can anyone say about Grimes and Astbury that hasn’t been said already? Both were imperious and unbeatable. Broad plays a lesser role but is also vital. Unrewarded by footy media chat. Such a redemptive two seasons he has had. Big fan of the plumbers apprentice.

The last quarter became a bit of a parade as we continued on with it. Solid enough footy against another contender with lots to play for. As up-tempo and ‘on our game’ as we have all season. A pleasure to watch, and their best game of the year so far (that I’ve been to). I did tweet at the end that it was such a good day that the game should never have ended.

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FOR THE LOVE OF THE LITTLE THINGS

The Maric factor.

Still influencing the club. Publicly but without fanfare.

From the Skipper cleaning up the rooms after a game to Nathan Broad picking up Tex’s strapping to now @JackRiewoldt08 picking up rubbish on the ground. My club is the best #gotiges #AFLTigersPower pic.twitter.com/UgNkDdQPti

— Trav Benson (@tcb934) July 20, 2019

The Brotherhood of Players.

Jack, and scrambling a dink of a kick forward from a contest, picked up by Stack (who pressured the ball out of the Power’s control), and then Stack handing the ball off to Brandon for the goal.

Rioli and Stack with their muted goal celebration late in the game.

Ivan II’s goal was a highlight. Not for his (should be trademarked) dink of a kick over the umps head and into row D, but for the player reactions around him. First to Ivan to celebrate was VFL ruck partner Mabior, who also celebrated with arms in the air as the mark was taken.

Positional Play

What a display by both Tommy Lynch and Jack Riewoldt. Working off each other and not in each others way. Some of the positioning and body work by Lynch was liquid football.

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Onward and Forward.

With almost every play the drive is forward.

Chol grabs a loose ball out of the ruck and takes them all on with a burst out of the congestion, while at the same appearing to be in no more than second gear and not even looking like moving to third. He follows it up with a lace-out kick to Lynch. Chol has a huge upside we have not seen half of yet.

An outnumber in the forward 50 and we still shunt on. How ridiculous is this game that Lynch can be 1 against 2, have a ball kicked in his general direction (by Rioli?) and then the bounce of the ball sets him up for a goal around the corner while being tackled? Ludicrous.

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Benny Votes by Lapsed Tiger

5 Tom Lynch
4 Dylan Grimes
3 Dustin Martin
2 David Astbury
1 Dion Prestia

Leaderboard

Houli 33
Martin 31
Grimes 24
Edwards 22
Vlastuin, Lynch 21
Stack, Prestia  18
Lambert 12
Ellis 11
Cotchin, Bolton 7
Castagna 6
Nankervis 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Astbury, Ross, Naish 2
Rioli, Balta 1

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Saturday 20 July 2019
It’s a bit of a shock to go to the footy on a Saturday afternoon. Clearly it was too much for most Richmond members, as only forty odd thousand turned up on this sunny day. I will try to curtail my usual whinges on this subject, but the fact is that there is little for our supporters to do. Our famed passion and loud voices are drowned out, all the time. Before the game starts one of the annoying signs on the fences reads, in yellow and black, “Restore the Roar.” Exactly at this time, loud thumping music is obliterating any crowd noise that might be made. For all the great things they are doing in so many areas, in this respect our Club is run by fools.

But there is much about this day to like. For one thing, my niece, who is 23 and hadn’t kicked a footy in anger until a year or two ago, is playing for Melbourne Uni against Fitzroy at Victoria Park. The first bounce is at midday so I catch an early train, step off at Vic Park at 11.45 and watch the first half of her game with her parents. She goes all right and her team are winning at half time. None of us ever, ever dreamed that one day we’d be here watching her – or any women’s team for that matter – playing the game we love.

Thanks to the magic of the Mernda Line I’m at the ‘G well before the Tigers game starts. I get a good spot in M9 against the barrier where I can lean my notepad and record and soak up the loud music. It’s an odd feeling to go to Richmond games expecting to win. And where once that expectation came with a greater expectation – “if we expect to win, we probably won’t” – these Tigers actually do win when they’re meant to. And yet Port aren’t that bad, only a game or two behind us despite plenty of injuries. And apparently, we haven’t beaten them here for 21 years. That must take us back almost to the day when we thumped the first-year Port Adelaide and Duncan Kellaway kicked a goal late in the last.

Port are playing in a light-blue jumper which I don’t care for. But I don’t like their normal jumper much either. The Richmond banner goes up. It incorporates the name of our “Match Day Sponsor”, Otterbox. Remind me never to use that product, even if my life depends on it. How dare they taint the banner with their corporate shite. People give up hours of their precious time to put that banner together. Putting an ad on it just isn’t right, I don’t care how much money the club gets for it.

Graham and Baker are in, two handy inclusion, for Egg and Mac. I’m not sure why those two are out, I thought Mac played quite well last week against the Giants.

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Our players look magnificent warming up in the sunshine at the Punt Road End. Queen is belting out over us. The pre-match build-up, the crowd getting louder and louder, is just distant memory now. A thumping count-down clock takes us up to the first bounce. This is imposed on us by Footy’s Ruling Class, people who never pay for a ticket or miss a Grand Final, people who possibly don’t even know people who pay to watch their team play. People who haven’t the faintest idea of how committed your everyday footy supporter is.

The Ruling Class pay marketers – 25 at last count in the RFC’s case – to come up with new ideas “to get the crowd involved.” Each idea is more inane and insulting than the last. The Countdown Clock is one such innovation, as if your average supporter had no idea that a match was about to start, the players taking up positions on the ground, the umpires checking that all is right in the centre square, that the hysterical, blood-curdling roar of forty thousand of the like-minded were not enough to tell them that a game was about to start…

I’m sorry, I really am trying not to whinge about this stuff. There’s a game to report on.

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We kick to the Punt Road end and start well. Bolton handballs to Prestia who goals on the run from 55 out. Lynch snaps a behind while being tackled. Then Chol passes to him again, he marks and goals from 50. Then Rioli handballs to Dusty who goals and 14 minutes have gone and we lead 3.2 to two points and long may it continue.
Howard for Port marks too easily and goals from 35. Then Butters steals the ball from Grimes after Shedda passed to him when he shouldn’t have and Port have two goals and I don’t like it. Richmond attack again but stuff it up. With too many options nobody seems prepared just to bang the ball forward and see what happens. But Riewoldt ends up being pushed in the back without the footy and goals from the free kick. We lead 4.2 to 2.2 with 18 gone.

Port win a free on their forward line for being Port Adelaide but miss. A very elaborate Tiger attack follows and Prestia kicks a point. We are finessing in way that will make Tommy Hafey rise from the grave in frustration. Graham kicks us another point from a long way out, it’s good to see him have a crack at it, at least. Port rebound and Grimes takes a great mark in defence. Then a stroke of luck for Richmond. From defence Port kick out on the full but Westhoff, to make sure that the ball is actually out, fists it away to make sure and the ump gives a 50 against him. Ridiculous. It’s not at all clear that he actually broke any rule at all. Still it gifts Graham a goal and we lead by three with 26 gone.

Richmond attack again with no result. One of the louder men in M9 yells out, “Go hard or go home Chol! Which, in light of recent events, and events stretching back into the grimmest pages of history, is pretty gross. Saying it to him is not quite the same as saying it to Grimes or Cotchin.

We lead by three goals at quarter time and our fussiness in attack has been very frustrating. Everyone seems terrified of being the one to lose the footy so they’re all looking for the easy pass.

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This continues early in the second when another attack founders when the ball is handpassed out of bounds in the pocket. But Stack makes up for our fumbling with some magical movement. He evades two tacklers before handballing to Riewoldt who goals from 15 out. We lead 6.4 to 2.4 with six minutes gone. Charlie Dixon pulls one back for Port, then Karl Amon adds another and our lead is down to two goals. Port seem to be defending very well, with all their tall players back and are dangerous on the rebound.

Baker is collected high and Port win a free kick. What do you expect? Only a point results. Chol wins a free for holding the ball and goals from 30 out. He seems to be a reliable set shot. He slotted a beauty from the pocket last week against the Giants.
Richmond attack quickly after the re-start, Lynch marks, Riewoldt marks, another goal from 30 out and we’re almost four goals up again.

But the electronic roar after each of our goals becomes more and more grating.

At half-time we lead 8.5 to 4.6. We’re still over-using the ball, but I’m glad we’re winning.

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At half time I am struck by the beauty of people standing and talking to each other in the bright winter sunshine at the Punt Road End. The music, a bit less loud and intrusive than usual (but still completely unnecessary) includes Paul Kelly’s song about making gravy. Apparently, they play songs from one of the Richmond players’ top five selection. Usually these are bands and singers I’ve never heard of, but today it’s Townsend’s turn and he likes the old stuff. Kelly, John Denver, Hall and Oates, even a Farnham song.

I want us to start the third term with a bang but Port score first and the lead is under three goals. Then Dixon for Port wins a free, literally for falling over, but kicks only a point. Port are setting up well across the ground and there is no space for the Tigers to run into. Then Shedda gathers and kicks to Lynch who marks 20 out and goals and I feel better. Another stuffed-up attack shortly after shows we haven’t lost the knack though.

Port get another lucky one when Amon marks a kick that had barely gone 15 feet but is awarded the mark and goals. Stack saves us again when he steals the footy, gathers and handpasses to Ellis for a goal. The quarter is half over and we lead 10.5 to 6.7. Rioli, who’s been having a mixed game, passes perfectly to Lynch 30 metres out but he misses the shot. Then Dusty finds Castagna in the pocket with a 55-metre pass and George scores from the tight angle. George has had a very good season so far, his set shots have often been brilliant and his footwork at time has been Messi-like.

Ellis kicks into the 50 and the oft-maligned Soldo rises and marks in a pack, 25 out. Goes back and kicks it and his team-mates gather around him in celebration. Port get one back through Amon again, who won’t go away.

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We lead by five goals at the last break and I begrudge Port that last goal. We’ve been more direct and have reaped the rewards. The last term starts well when Lynch snaps and goals while being tackled. Then Riewoldt holds a one-handed mark, kicks to the square where Shedda gathers and goals. We’re seven goals up and hungry for more.

Port get one back, Stack marks right in front but misses. He’s human after all. Chol marks, passes to Lynch who marks and misses from a tight angle. Then marks and misses again. At the 25-minute mark Stack handballs to Rioli who goals and we’re seven goals up again. Riewoldt marks a pass from Baker but misses. Port get the last goal of the game and we win by 38 points.

Final Score: Richmond 15.11.101 Port Adelaide 9.9.63

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It really is a great thing to be winning the games we’re expected to win. It’s what good teams do. And I think there’s plenty of room for improvement with this team. They look like a good team who are still learning how to work together, which they are. I doubt if we’ve had the same team on the park two weeks in a row this season. And the quality of the players who want to fight their way back in is very impressive – Caddy, Nankervis, Mac, Egg, Ross, Townsend and his daggy songs… I’m not expecting Rance to perform miracles, though.

I thought our best players were defenders – Grimes, Astbury, Broad and Houli all did well. Soldo and Chol were solid in the ruck and around the ground. Dusty was good – well, very good, actually. I do hold him to high standards though. But his 55m pass to Castagna in the third was a thing of beauty. Bolton and Stack were very good too. Stack has a knack of doing the special thing when we need it most.

Next week against the Pies we need fewer stats and more goals. That’s not too much to ask is it?

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Benny Votes by Lapsed Tiger

5 Tom Lynch
4 Dylan Grimes
3 Dustin Martin
2 David Astbury
1 Dion Prestia

Leaderboard

Houli 33
Martin 31
Grimes 24
Edwards 22
Vlastuin, Lynch 21
Stack, Prestia  18
Lambert 12
Ellis 11
Cotchin, Bolton 7
Castagna 6
Nankervis 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Astbury, Ross, Naish 2
Rioli, Balta 1

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NEXT TIME BRING A KNEE-RUG
A week ago I was with family and friends kicking the footy around on the immense salty crust of Lake Eyre, twelve metres below sea level and 1,500 kms away from the MCG. (Actually, the nearby town of Marree has its own MCG, a modest oval of dust and gibber. But it’s a long time since Marree managed to field a team, probably as far back as the when the old Ghan railway stopped running in 1980.)

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Back in Melbourne, a friend calls to say they have a spare ticket in a fancy part of the Great Southern Stand where I’ve never been welcomed in the past, perfectly positioned on level 2. The seats have built in drink holders and there’s a bloke who holds the door open when you head to the bar. That said, there’s an icy wind blowing misty rain across the ground and I realise too late that I should have brought along a knee-rug. (This might be one of those coming-of-age moments where one acknowledges a new level of maturity, in this case the embrace of being an old codger.)

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I arrive just as Sydney Stack shimmies around a couple of opponents and spears through a lovely goal at the city end. Young Syd plays with such endearing confidence, and I can see why he’s so quickly become a crowd favourite. Meanwhile, the opposition go one man down when Coniglio collapses with a knee injury. My friend Mary tells me that ‘coniglio’ means ‘rabbit’ in Italian, so we’re disappointed now that we won’t get to make any Easter themed jokes about the Rabbit and the Egg contesting a loose ball on the half-back flank.
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Nevertheless, throughout the afternoon I greatly enjoy calling out Derek Eggmolesse-Smith’s excellent name whenever he gets the ball. (Incidentally, the atmosphere on level 2 does seem a bit too genteel, so I feel obliged to holler in my most raucous voice whenever the urge takes me.)
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The Tigers effectively win this game in the first quarter, kicking four goals to nil. Jack Riewoldt celebrates his return to the team with one of these, after marking a beautiful long pass from Tom Lynch. We see a few instances of this linking between our two big forwards throughout the afternoon and hope that this augurs well for the forthcoming ‘business end of the season’. The wet conditions don’t make it an ideal day for tall marking players but, despite this, Lynch pulls in a few rippers throughout the day. He’s such a big, strong unit, seemingly growing in confidence as the season goes on.
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I confess that I’ve been slow to warm to our prize recruit. I’ve been put off by his preppy good looks and by the shabby saga of his desertion of his former team, even though one can’t really blame anyone for wanting to depart the Gold Coast. But now I’m coming around. I have to admire the way he’s fronted up for every game of the season, even though he hardly trained in the lead up. He’s stuck to the task, and despite some flat patches, he now seems to be striking top form at precisely the right time.

Our team have their running game up and going, linking beautifully with handballs and deft kicks to take the ball the length of the ground. It’s only when we get inside our attacking 50 metre arc that things too often come undone, a failing lamented by the coach after the game. There’s always room for improvement.

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Momentum ebbs and flows throughout the remaining three quarters of the game, the opposition sometimes coming back at us before the Tigers inevitably respond and steady. Our lead gets out to six or seven goals at one stage, finishing up at around the same four-goal break we set up in the first stanza. For the GWS franchise Jeremy Cameron is always a threatening presence, and we’re glad he’s missing more shots at goal than he’s kicking. Toby Greene does an excellent job in his role as pantomime villain, the player we love to boo whenever he touches the ball. He touches the ball 34 times, so the pantomime has plenty of life throughout the afternoon. The best moment is where he gives away a (quite soft) free kick at the top of the Tigers’ goal square in the final quarter, gifting Titch Edwards a free goal immediately after Kane Lambert has snuck through a lovely curling banana from the forward pocket. I’m sad to see our one-time superstar Brett Deledio looking but a shadow of the player he once was. He’s still a stylish mover, but his ability to impact the game seems greatly diminished.

Less elegant but much more effective is our man Kane Lambert, stepping up on three occasions throughout the afternoon to kick vital goals that shift momentum back in a Tigerly direction. There’s nothing flashy about Lambert’s game but he’s a tireless worker, and I reckon he ends up being the best player on the ground.

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Our defenders are as staunch as we love them to be, combining beautifully to repel most opposition forays. (Reading the stats after the game I see that GWS narrowly won the inside 50 count, but the quality of our defence meant that they never ever looked like winning.) Bachar is in superb form, running the ball out of defence all afternoon, and Dylan Grimes puts in one of characteristically effective Inspector Gadget performances. I enjoy the Tigers’ mix of players that exude style and class – Shai Bolton being the most conspicuous in this match – and others that play the game in a less conspicuous but no less effective manner. Lambert might be the best example, but Prestia, Ellis and Broad also fall into this category. I have that feeling again that the Tigers are a really strong team, building momentum as a host of good players return from injury. The fact of a player as good as Josh Caddy running ‘round in the reserves this weekend reinforces the notion that we suddenly seem to have an abundance of talent. With several challenging games to come in the remainder of the season, we’ll soon know whether this optimistic perception is justified.
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Benny Votes
5. Kane Lambert
4. Tom Lynch
3. Bachar Houli
2. Dylan Grimes
1. Shai Bolton

Leaderboard

Houli 33
Martin 28
Edwards 22
Vlastuin 21
Grimes 20
Stack 18
Prestia 17
Lynch 16
Lambert 12
Ellis 11
Cotchin, Bolton 7
Castagna 6
Nankervis 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Ross, Naish 2
Rioli, Balta 1

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We went away last weekend and Saturday happened to be the loveliest of winter days. Bright sun, not a puff of wind nor a cloud in the sky. We rode our bikes into Portarlington and op-shopped, lunched and lay on the beach. On the ride back my daughter asked me if I’d heard about the footy, which had already started. She said that even in the second quarter, Richmond were absolutely “harrumping” the Gold Coast.

This was how it should be, of course. But still, a bit surprising. I don’t follow closely the fortunes of the AFL’s experiments, but I had a feeling that Gold Coast weren’t the duds this year that they were last. Only later did I learn that in fact they’d lost ten in a row already.

But playing away against a team that you should beat well can bring plenty of pressure. Nobody is that bad forever. And we have a nightmare history against the Gold Coast, having squandered premiership points against them when we sold our away games and played them in Cooktown or somewhere in 2011 and 2012, dropped games that we should have won.

So now I construct a match report with no tape of the game, just the match reports of others, YouTube highlights and having listened to the second half on the radio.

Caddy is out injured and Derek Eggmolesse-Smith is playing his first game. After two minutes the first goal is kicked by Lynch. He’s had his share of knockers this year, as you might expect of a big forward on the big bucks. But I think he’s stood up well, coping with his own injuries in an injury-ravaged team. Now, playing against his former club, he starts off with a strong mark and a good kick and there’s nothing Gold Coast can do about that.

Before seven minutes have ticked over the Tigers have two more, to Bolton and Castagna yet have been inside 50 only four times. Then Prestia and Rioli score and it’s five goals in the first ten minutes. Castagna gets two more before the first break, Lynch gets another and Cotchin goals as well and it’s true what my daughter told me, Richmond are absolutely harrumping them.

Richmond haven’t had a first quarter this good since 1981, according to the commentator.

Quarter time scores: Richmond 9.2 to Gold Coast 2.1

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Lambert, who is always good, kicks three goals in the second quarter.

Gold Coast are not in great shape, it has to be said. Just before the main break Ellis is awarded a 50 in the backline but no Suns player mans the mark, so he plays on and kicks a goal from 50 metres out. It’s the first time in seven years that any team in the AFL has kicked 100 points in the first half.

Half-time scores: Richmond 16.7 to Gold Coast 3.1

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Gold Coast finally remember how to play footy again and win this quarter, 4.1 to 3.2. On the radio it feels worse than this, but I’m glad Richmond haven’t given up more of their lead. They need percentage and they need it badly.

Lynch and Chol are the targets of a long kick to the goal square. Chol plucks it, plays on and goals. Having two big targets up forward seems like such a luxury. Even having one is good. But what will we do when Riewoldt is fit again?

Three-quarter time scores: Richmond 19.9 to Gold Coast 7.2

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Halfway through the last quarter Lynch kicks his third, a set shot on an angle from 50 metres out and I’m so glad he plays for us. A bit later Lambert collects a hospital pass from a player I won’t name – because it’s a team game and everyone makes mistakes – and is collected mid-air by a Suns player. He tumbles to earth, bending his neck in a way you don’t want to see. But he’s all right and the game goes on.

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Castagna kicks his fifth, his best return in the big league. Ex-Tiger Anthony Miles kicks the last goal of the day which began with an ex-Sun scoring for the Tigers. On the radio they describe the players from opposing teams catching up with their former team-mates. I was always a big fan of Anthony Miles and I hope he’s happy at the Suns. And Prestia is an ex-Sun too. If only the AFL would come to its senses and move them all to Tasmania.

Full-time scores: Richmond 23.12.150 to Gold Coast 9.4.58

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To put this in perspective, the Suns are not in a good way. But an away game against un-fancied opponents can often spell trouble. In the past this was the sort of game Richmond would often stuff up. Not this team though. I’m very pleased with the spread of goal-kickers and the continuing good form of the new players – Stack, Chol and Bolton in particular. Eggmolesse-Smith has played a good first game too. Cotch seems back to his best and Lynch keeps standing up. I could name the whole team. The Age gives Castagna best on ground, with other votes for Lambert, Prestia, Cotchin and Broad.

On Sunday we play the Giants at the ‘G. They seem to be in a bit of a dip and have bad form at this ground. But they do have 45 first-round draft picks in their squad and this will be a proper test for us.

Michael Gleeson in the Age points out that Richmond are sixth with nine wins after 16 rounds, exactly where they were, and with a similar percentage, in 2017. But in 2017 we barely had a player injured and this year we’ve hardly had a player who hasn’t been. So who knows?

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Benny Votes
Castagna (5), Lambert (4), Prestia (3), Cotchin (2), Broad (1).

Leaderboard

Houli 30
Martin 28
Edwards 22
Vlastuin 21
Grimes, Stack 18
Prestia 17
Lynch 13
Ellis 11
Lambert, Cotchin 7
Bolton, Castagna 6
Nankervis 5
Baker, Broad 4
Chol 3
Ross, Naish 2
Rioli, Balta 1

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Its Sunday, its cold and rainy, and am I sitting by the heater with the radio on. My plan was to work while I listen but I am finding it impossible due to pre-game anxiety. I am just going in circles.

I am actually feeling confident of a solid win and of the team gelling well, but also in the long run it will be to no avail. I did the ladder predictor earlier and it told me we would finish 9th below Essendon on percentage. Our percentage is worse than Hawthorn’s and they are 15th.

I am delighted for Marbs that he’s been retained in the side. It will be good for Noah Balta to have a rest and – I am confident he’ll be a long term player at Richmond.

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Terrible start. Junk 50 entries from us. Saints have stolen our game plan. Pinging it around. Ross does a little Dan Rioli-style pat to keep the flow going and it ends in a Josh Bruce running goal. Then two more to Acres and Marshall. We are in deep awfully quickly.

Sydney Staaaaaaaack!!! 7 stars have come back into this side and the one who has to kick start us is a 19-year-old. A fantastic screamer – sounds good on the radio but I have now seen it on Twitter. He lines up Hunter Clark from 15 metres away to be his stepladder. What a wonderful addition to Richmond he is. It is so right that we are the only club that would take him, because we are the club that can use him best in my opinion.

Stack above the pack 😎🚀#AFLSaintsTigers #gotiges pic.twitter.com/uw6yBNQWNi

— Richmond FC 🐯 (@Richmond_FC) June 30, 2019

Sydney’s mark by the amazing Kate Birrell, painted back home from a photograph

And the ball got down to him thanks to a wonderful strong mark from Mabior Chol on the wing. He’s playing well, has great awareness and seems ready for this level.

Marbs! Marks and goals after leading out to Dusty, with three minutes left. A confident start from the South Sudanese Sensation.

Vlastuin is running and spreading, has six marks for the quarter. We are back in it at the break 18 – 12.

Kate’s plein air painting done on the spot, under the dome. Her work here on her site is worth a good look.

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Stack goals again while am I making a sandwich, and Dion scores a behind to put us in front. And… breathe.

Then the Saints take control again, somehow getting their kicks in without much pressure from our midfield. Suddenly, from a point up we are 4 goals down in six minutes. I am feeling furious, disconnected and anxious sitting by the radio.

Goal to Bolton. Lynch brings it to ground in a pack and the little feller is front and centre and kicks straight.

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It’s all happening too fast. I want it to slow down. Now I am looking over Marcus’ shoulder at his phone for the rest of the quarter. Marbs again! What a lovely left foot set shot he is.

Then Sydney out on 50 just within the boundary steps inside and sinks the goal from 45. Dusty is being given ages by the umps to get rid of it. It’s not really fair but I am not petitioning the AFL about it. The new no-mo Stack has 3 goals.

We go in four points down with no goals yet from the Anglo-Saxon contingent. The scoring has swung in big storm surges and I am feeling a bit seasick. Lambert is making a terrific return, 16 touches so far.

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On ABC radio the half time chat with Brad Sewell and Parko is about Stack needing to build his tank to play midfield. Parko: “I hope he stays unfit so he keeps jumping on people’s heads like he does”.

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We restart and its with Lynch who misses, and cops a serve from the radio team. “You never see him DEMANDING the ball” – Sewell.

Finally after a long wait a really good team chain of possessions ends with Lynch in the square, and he roosts it towards the roof. Great goal. Back in front, and into seventh on the live ladder which we all shouldn’t care about in June.

10 minutes after half time Sewell says “McIntosh had Lynch SCREAMING at him for a pass out wide and McIntosh turned back into the channel”. Yeah Brad, you are turning out to be a bit of a dickhead.

Dusty must have sensed the pressure Tom is under, because he took a risk to square it to him for the first goal of the 2nd half, when could have kicked it himself in his sleep.

Dan Rioli goals easily after great work from Martin and Graham and a shimmy from Sheds. Then Caddy adds another. Sydney had the chance there to destroy his opposite nº44 Wilkie but simply dispossessed him. We have a 14-point lead, the ship is steadying as we have kicked the last six.
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At this point our old dog went berserk, because his best mate went past the back gate, and he NEEDED to get out there. So my idea of a walk with my head down listening to the rest of the game became instead a social walk with a dear (human) friend who has no interest in footy. But it was lovely to see the dogs play and my game-day anxiety just faded for the thirty minutes or so, until I excused myself to come back in and listen to the conclusion.

[Highlights I missed were: Ellis goal. Caddy delivery to Lynch. Amazing chain of possession with great evasive skills from Bolton and Castagna, George ends up slotting it from boundary on his left. Wonderful.]

When I get back the Sainters are starting to fray, and no-one nominates for the ruck, allowing Marbs to stroll in in and kick a very easy goal, his third.

We are easing in now to a comfortable win with some confidence-building goals to Chol and Lynch. Though having said that Marbs doesn’t seem lacking in confidence. And Sydney Stack – words fail me. He’s moved forward and kicked four. Could be anything. Could win the Brownlow, this year.

Since typing that I have looked at the official Brownlow vote predictor and S Stack is currently on zero votes.

In the Saints’ second half they kicked 3.10. If they had kicked straight they could have given us a serious fright. At times they looked a good match for us, and when they decided to play keepings-off we had no option but to occupy space and be patient.
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Benny Votes
Dusty (5) was in classic form and had both the Saints and the men in green in his thrall.

Stack (4) had an amazing 15-touch game. Kicked four goals, was also a creative engine and a defensive menace in the front half. A revelation as a permanent forward.

Chol (3) kicked 3 goals in his third game, and did it all – forward, back and ruck, with aplomb.

Prestia (2) had 29 touches and carried a load, with both Edwards and Cotchin having quiet returns.

Vlastuin (1) had 26 touches and 11 marks and was a dead end for many St Kilda thrusts forward.
Leaderboard

Houli 30
Martin 28
Edwards 22
Vlastuin 21
Grimes, Stack 18
Prestia 14
Lynch 13
Ellis 11
Bolton 6
Cotchin, Nankervis 5
Baker 4
Broad, Chol, Lambert 3
Ross, Naish 2
Rioli, Castagna, Balta 1

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Richmond went into this match overwhelming underdogs. The week before we’d been beaten by Geelong by 12 goals after a good first quarter. Adelaide had giant-killed the Corporate Giants and so proven themselves to be The Real Thing. We still had lots of players injured and Cotchin had been added to the list, again, as well as deputy deputy skipper Sheds.

We love Dusty but were disappointed that he, and not Sheds was tossing the coin. I don’t know if we’ve lost a game under Sheds, but there you go.

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In the first half nearly everything goes right. We tackle in the forward 50 like it’s 2017 again and our chances are converted. Mabior Chol, in only his second game and his first since 2016, scores in the first minutes with a quick soccer snap. He goes on to have a good night, taking turns in the ruck and up forward. Lynch has a good night too and Rioli seems to have his kicking boots on again. Adelaide’s big guns, Walker and Jenkins and miss from right in front.

Adelaide come back in the second but Richmond hit back hard late in the quarter and lead by 11 at the big break. At home we’re bubbling with excitement. The Tigers are back and are going to pull off a big upset.
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In the third we somehow let the Crows kick five goals in a row. Taylor and Jenkins figure out that it’s the big sticks they’re meant to kick between and Garthwaite, while trying hard, is no match for them. At the last break Adelaide lead by 13 but we haven’t given up.

In the last we let them kick another five in a row. This is a mistake by the Tigers. If I were Dimma I’d advise against letting your opponents kick more than a couple. Early in the quarter Caddy goals and there’s only a goal in it but after that hope leaches away. We’re clearly under-gunned and too many of Adelaide’s 2017 GF team have had very good games. The Crouch brothers have about a hundred touches between them. Jenkins gets injured, but apparently not too badly, right at the end. I hate to see great players injured but gee, it would have been handy if he’d done it in the first minute of the game and not the last.
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In the end we lose by 35 points which is very disappointing after being so close for so long. The game is saved from being totally forgettable by a ridiculous Eddie Betts goal deep into time-on in the last, with the match already lost. From right on the boundary, a good way out, he snaps and scores. The goal would be memorable anyway, were it not something Betts has done twenty times before, but Sydney Stack, by openly congratulating him straight after, makes it a talking point.

He had said something to Betts earlier – “no special goals tonight, brother” – and in fact Betts had been pretty well held. It was Walker and Jenkins who did most of the damage up forward. But when he pulled this off Stack had to acknowledge his genius. And also admit, publicly, that when you’re six goals down in time on and Betts pulls off a stroke of genius like this, that you can say, “It’s just a game that we play for fun.” Because, if you can’t say that, what’s the point of anything?

Game recognise game.

Sydney Stack shows his appreciation for Eddie’s brilliance! #AFLCrowsTigers pic.twitter.com/nVWOdOdWho
— AFL (@AFL) June 13, 2019

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Houli is our best player. He does the things he has to do and he does them well and he does them all night. Dusty plays well and kicks a couple, as does Rioli. Chol has a very good game and I’d keep him in the team. Vlaustin, Grimes and Stack all played very well. Early in the game Stack steamed through a crowded centre corridor like a very fast, agile, steaming thing. Prestia gets a good bit of the footy but misses goals I wish he’d kicked. The magic seems to have faded a bit for Jack Higgins – footy is starting to look as hard for him as it is for everyone else.

This match seems a long time ago now. I did enjoy not having a game to worry about last weekend. Now to the Saints at Docklands at the traditional time of 1.10pm Sunday. I don’t think I’ll pay to go to this one so might do a radio match report.

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Benny Votes

Houli 5, Martin 4, Prestia 3, Stack 2, Lynch 1

Leaderboard

Houli 30
Martin 23
Edwards 22
Vlastuin 20
Grimes 18
Stack 14
Lynch 13
Prestia 12
Ellis 11
Bolton 6
Cotchin, Nankervis 5
Baker 4
Broad, Lambert 3
Ross, Naish 2
Rioli, Castagna, Balta 1